Pour your heart into it
Ok, I”ll admit that I stole that title from the incredible book written by Starbucks founder Howard Schultz, but the truth is that is the perfect way to describe how I’m feeling now. I have a lot of interesting things going on, as usual, but I still have held myself back from pouring into anyone in particular. I have to wonder , why? Am I afraid? Maybe I’m afraid of failure? The crazy thing is that the only thing preventing me from having and doing what I want is me. So why am I blocking me?
Do you realize that the person or thing that has the single greatest, by far, impact on your life is you? Do you realize how much power and choice you really have over your life? It is so easy to give in to the idea that there are things around you controlling you and your daily life. Not true. Do you HAVE to pay your bills? Do you HAVE to answer your phone? Do you HAVE to be in to work at any time? No. These are all choices. It’s incredibly empowering to realize really how much control you have in your life. So for me, I sit here wondering really how I’m holding myself back for the moment. I will say that I’m giving a lot more leeway simply because of the difficult year this has been, but I still want to be thinking and moving. So again, why have I been preventing myself from “risking it?” I think fear.
So what am I afraid of? Doing it wrong? Who cares? What really is there to lose? Absolutely nothing. I will say that my improv classes is not only helping how I speak in front of people, and think on my feet, but they are also helping to remove that “editor,” that lives in my head. You know that same voice that would get real loud when you knew the answer in a class and say “no, no that’s not right…don’t say it or else you’ll look dumb.” With the improv the right answer is ALWAYS the first answer. Let the words stream directly from your head. I believe this is a powerful life license as well. Listen to your gut, and go with it. Don’t let doubt and barriers cloud your view. I believe that your gut usually is right.
So here I am, looking for that opportunity to “pour my heart into,” when the truth is that opportunity will never come until I drop this wall of fear. Let it go, stop the editor, and allow yourself to really be invested in something.